The Walton's Window

Six Month Mark

2012-01-18T17:41:00.000-06:00

One of Josh's fun nurses came by for a visit

^{Today marks six months since wereceived Josh’s preliminary cancer diagnoses.}

^{-Six months since we sat in Dr. Matt Turner’soffice as he expressed concern over Josh’s extremely low blood counts.}

^{-Six months since we raced to theemergency room in BSA.}

^{- Six months since the words,“possible cancer and Josh", were uttered together in the same sentence.}

^{-Six months since our lives werecompletely turned upside down and inside out.}

^{On the other hand;}

^{-Six moths of seeing life throughdifferent eyes}

^{-Six months of seeing our Lord muchmore clearly}

^{-Six months of being far more thankfuland grateful for each day we are given.}

Familiar Shadows

2012-01-12T15:04:00.000-06:00

Monday morning Joshua woke up feelinglike something was wrong. I took his temp throughout the morning and it read asnormal. He had lab work done on Sunday and nothing alarming had shown up. Hiscounts were low but not low enough to need a transfusion. He had alreadycommented on Sunday that he was getting, “that feeling again”. He was talkingabout the feeling he usually gets before he begins to fever.

Monday afternoon, I ran out to do anerrand and he texted me, “I am not feeling good, feeling really bad”. Sarah waswith him and called to say his temp was up to 100.2. I jumped in the car andheaded home. When I arrived home, Josh was, once again, curled up in a fetalposition on his futon, under a pile of blankets, shivering. I called his BSA Dr who instructed us to get him right in.

Sarah and I began our, “quickly getJosh to the hospital”, drill. We have learned, by this time, to remain packed.Sarah called Brian to tell him what was happening. I threw a few additionalthings in suitcases for Brian and I, and she packed all of Josh’s “necessities”,his computer, phone, chargers and hats. We quickly loaded up the car.

Josh was already unable to walk on hisown so we had to wait until Brian got home and we loaded him in the car. Theroad to Amarillo always seems longer than usual as we race to BSA. I monitoredhis temp along the way. It was quickly elevating and reached 104.6. Even thoughit was high, Brian and I knew we had been here before and knew The Lord hadseen us through it.

When we reached BSA, Josh was too weekto walk so we loaded him into a wheel chair and got him to the second floorwhere they had a room, on the main pediatric floor, already prepared for him.They immediately got fluids going in him and hooked him up to monitors. Brainand I felt relieved to know he was getting the care he needed. We begin torelax in the familiar setting with the friendly staff that had become likefamily.

Then things seemed to quickly worsen,his blood pressure began to drop as his heart rate accelerated. At 2 am, theymoved him to the ICU so he could be more closely monitored. The Dr said he was already beginning to go into shock. They were concerned, once again of him becoming septic and foradditional strain being place on his, already compromised, heart.

All of the old fears and memoriesflooded back. I feared that we could have come so far only to loose him. I hadto remind myself of all that the Lord had brought us through and that I knew we could trust Him with our son’s life. Once again, I was overcome Hisunexplainable peace.

The next day, they were able to get hissystem regulated through medication and he began to quickly improve. They movedhim back out to the main floor and we began to talk about getting him home.

Yesterday, the Dr said we would probablyget to go home today. He was just waiting for one more result to come from thelab. Brian had a meeting last night he wanted to be at so he headed home withthe plan to come back the next day and bring us home.

After he left, the results came back fromthe lab. The bacteria had continued to grow even though they had hit him hardwith antibiotics. The thought of going home soon began to diminish.

Josh fevered through the night and intothe early morning. They took more blood samples for more tests. We met with theDr who explained that they would need use additional antibiotics in hopes ofwiping out the bacteria. They are also preparing to transfuse him withplatelets again later today.

So here we are, just waiting out thestorm, knowing that, as always, our Lord has a plan. Josh, for the most part isin a pretty good mood. He has a fairly steady line of visitors that mask up andcheck in on him. We would all rather be home but we know we are where the Lordhas us for now. We know He has a reason, even if it is merely to remind us thatHe walks the valleys with us.

Two Homecomings

2012-01-05T13:56:00.001-06:00

Some of the amazing BSA staff!

Yesterday Josh completed his last roundof chemo! It was almost a little surreal. I woke up yesterday morning, in ourroom at the Ronald Mc Donald House, which had begun to feel much like a secondhome to us, with a feeling of excitement laced with a little anxiety.

Sarah and I got packed up to head overto the hospital. As we said our goodbyes to the staff at the RM House, I felt asadness. The staff had become like family to us. They had followed Josh’sprogress and were so excited for all of us that he was done with treatment…yetsaying goodbye was hard. We will always be so grateful for our dear friends atthe RM House and for all that they do to support families who are in crisis.

When we got to BSA, the staff from the Pediatrics floor was preparing for an “End of Chemo” celebration for Josh. Again, it was bittersweet. The amazing staff had walked us through some of the most difficult days of our lives. Many of them had played a part in saving Josh’s life, on several occasions. It was hard to say goodbye to them as well. They had all shown us such kindness and compassion. Josh, for the first time ever, was really in no hurry to leave.

Once we finally got packed up andheaded home, my head swam with the emotions of the past six months. We had notseen any of this coming. Our lives were so much different than they were sixmonths ago. I knew we could still potentially have some tough days ahead, but Ibegan to look forward to Josh being healthy again and all the possibilitiesthat might entail.

We arrived home to find a wonderfulwelcoming committee on our front porch. Even now, as I think back on thatsight, tears come to my eyes. We have been so cared for by our friends andneighbors. We are blessed way more than we deserve.

Then, yesterday evening, we receivedsad news. Our dear friend, and father of Tiffany Carothers, Randy Gwaltney,went home to be with the Lord. Randy and his family waged a valiant, andcourageous battle against cancer. He was great man; he lived a life thathonored his Lord. He dearly loved his wife, his children and his grandchildrenand was loved by them. He was highly esteemed by his co-workers, his church andhis community. While he now has a new and healthy body in Heaven, he will begreatly missed here on earth.

So while Josh came home to Dalhart,Randy went home to be with his Heavenly Father. I am unsure as to why things gothe way that they do, but I am sure the One who directs our path. Our heartbreaks for Randy’s family for their tremendous loss.

LAST THREE DAYS OF CHEMO

2012-01-02T05:57:00.001-06:00

Two of Josh's favorite nurses, Sherrel from Coon Mem. Hosp and Lori from BSA

Thismorning I awoke with many conflicting emotions racing through my mind. We haveeagerly anticipated this last round of chemo. It marks a potential end to along and wearying journey. So much has happened in what feels like the longestsix months of our lives.

This lastround of chemo has been unusual in that it is in two parts. Last week wechecked Josh into BSA, the day after Christmas, for the first three days ofchemo. Then, they sent us home for four days of rest for Josh. Today he willreturn for the final three days of chemo.

He hasfelt very good the last couple of days. We are seeing signs of the, “Old Josh”,the “Pre-cancer”, Josh. He has been full of life, even, at times ornery. He isready to get past this part of his life, to close this chapter and get on tothe next. We are even beginning to tentatively plan an, “End of Chemo/18^thBirthday” party for him.

Yet,before we jump too far ahead, we must get through these last three days ofchemo and all that entails. He will, once again, loose his hair that has justbegun to come in. His energy will disappear along with the nearly constant mischievouslook in his eyes. The, “yucky feeling”, will return along with the threat offever and infection. The ever-present fear of the past dark valleys will wakeus with a jolt in the early morning hours.

As weenter this final faze, we know we do not enter alone. Even if we must enter thedark valley, we know that others will faithfully walk it with us. We are so aware that thishas not been just, “Josh’s journey”, or even, “the Walton’s journey”. We knowthat it has been a journey that our dear friends and family, our church and ourcommunity have walked as well. Ourexisting friendships have grown deeper and we have made some new friends alongthe way. Our eyes have been opened to things and people we have not knownbefore.

While weare anxious to, “get on with our lives”, we never want to go back to where wewere. Our knowledge and understanding of our Heavenly Father has grown richerthan we ever thought possible. We have also found a preciousness to life we didnot know existed prior to this journey. We want never to take this life we havebeen given for granted. Each day is a gift granted to us by our Creator. Wefeel an urgency to live each day to it’s fullest for we are not guaranteedanother.

Merry Christmas From the Waltons!

2011-12-20T10:07:00.000-06:00

Merry Christmas dear family and friends! This has been quite a year for us. We have seen the Lord more clearly than we ever have in our lives before. We want to say THANK YOU to all of you who have walked this valley with us. Never before have we walked such a dark valley. While walking in this valley, you have walked with us. With you by our sides, the terrifying shadows do not seem quite so terrifying and the sweet grass and still waters seem even sweeter.
We have seen the body of Christ utilize their gifts in a supernatural way and have blessed beyond measure. We pray that the Lord will greatly bless all of you in this upcoming New Year! We love you all so very much!

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR, FROM THE WALTONS!

IN THE VALLEY...part 3

2011-11-19T17:48:00.001-06:00

October 11, 2011

When Dr. Turner told us Josh needed to be transported toBSA in Amarillo, Josh tried to talk him out of it. He had gotten to know andadore the staff at Coon Memorial Hospital and felt comfortable there. Dr Turnerexplained that they did not have the technology available to them to monitorJosh’s condition to the degree that he needed to be monitored.

At first we thought he was going to be transported byambulance. Then we found out that he was in critical enough condition towarrant air transportation. Again, Josh seemed daunted by the situation. Bythis time, Josh had begun hallucinating and was often disoriented. He had begun hearing voices of peoplewho were not in the room. He would doze for a few minutes and then wake upstartled, and ask where everyone had gone. He was sure the room had been filledwith people. He would rattle off a list of names of people he was sure had justbeen in the room. None of them had been there. This frustrated and confusedhim.

We were unsure as to whether they would allow Brian or Ito fly with him, so Brian ran home, grabbed some things for a few nights stayand got on the road towards Amarillo. We did not want Josh to arrive at thehospital without one of us there. One of the nurses, Logan who had become agreat friend to Josh, was off that day but had come by to see him. He assuredJosh that the helicopter was the best way to go. Logan talked Josh through thewhole process. By the time the helicopter arrived, Josh had warmed up to theidea of a helicopter ride.

As it turned out, they did allow me to ride in the helicopter with him. As they prepared Josh for travel, the pilot brought me outsideto orientate me for the flight. As we waited outside for Josh to arrive, we satfacing the emergency room doors that he would be wheeled out of. We had beenwaiting for a while when all of a sudden the doors opened and a pack of peopleswarmed out, with Josh in the middle of the pack on his stretcher. Hospitalstaff, as well as dear friends, that had come to see him off, surrounded him.It warmed my heart.

Even though we were there due to rough circumstances, theride was amazing. As we flew over the rooftops of Dalhart, it was breathtakingto see things from an aerial view. As I took in the view, I could see theskyline of Dalhart, Dumas and Amarillo all at the same time. I could see hillsand valleys that I never knew were out there. It dawned on me that this is howdifferent the Lord’s view must be from our own. He gets to see the wholepicture of our lives. That thought, oddly enough, brought me great comfort.

To be continued...

IN THE VALLEY part 2

2011-11-16T11:16:00.001-06:00

The Sunday prior to Josh being hospitalized,we had a guest worship leader, at our church, by the name of Matthew Duhon. Theatmosphere seemed electric and alive. As we participated in worship, I missedJosh being with us at church, and wished he had been there to hear Matthew. Hewould have loved his vibrant, youthful energy, just as the other youth did, butI particularly wanted him to see Matthew.Matthew was, well…bald. Earlier in Josh’s treatment, his hair-loss was anextremely low spot in his journey. I wanted him to see Mathew sporting hisbaldness, boldly. Matthew was young and trendy appeared to have chosen his lackof hair as part of his cool look. (We learned otherwise earlierJ)

We sang many amazing songs thatmorning, some newer worship songs and some tastefully updated hymns. Among themwas an updated version of, “Nothing but the Blood of Jesus”. In the following days, when Josh’s washospitalized, I awoke with that same song running through my thoughts. As thedays went by, and Josh’s condition worsened, the song became louder in my head.

Your bloodspeaks a better word. Than all the empty claims I’ve heard upon this earth,speaks righteousness for me. And stands in my defense, Jesus it’s Your blood

 What can washaway our sins? What can make us whole again? Nothing but the blood, nothing butthe blood of Jesus. What can wash us pure as snow? Welcomed as the friends of God.Nothing but Your blood Nothing but Your blood King Jesus

Your crosstestifies in grace. Tells of the Father’s heart to make a way for us.  Nowboldly we approach. Not by earthly confidence. It’s only Your blood.

We thank Youfor the blood. We thank You for the blood

We praise Youfor the blood. We praise You for the blood

Nothing butYour blood, nothing but Your blood King Jesus

In our family, we fully believethat nothing happens by, “accident”, even the songs that run through our head.At one point, in a passing thought, I asked the Lord why that particular songran through my head…He stopped me in my tracks…I heard His voice clearly headand in my heart…”It is Josh’s blood that is damaged”….

Whatcan make (Josh) whole again? Nothing but the blood, nothing but the blood ofJesus.

To be continued…

IN THE VALLEY...part 1

2011-11-15T13:05:00.001-06:00

Psalm 23:4
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

I must apologize for my lack of current blogging.My wonderful husband has the uncanny ability to accurately communicate through the written word in times of crisis. I, on the other hand, go into “shut-downmode”. It is sometimes even difficult to eek out a text, and when I do, it is only ascant, often non-descriptive cry for prayer.

Josh is currently sleeping calmly in his hospitalbed here at BSA. We are on round four of five. We are simply waiting for days of chemo to go by. Josh usually sleepsthrough these days, waking only in the afternoons. During those brief hours ofhim being awake, his room is buzzing with nurses, doctors, visitors andlaughter. This time of him receiving chemo is, for the most, the easy part.The scary times come in the days that follow.

So now, once again, as I sit in a quite PICUhospital room, I will attempt to piece together the events that transpired overthe last few months. Please forgive me if I ramble and jump around a bit. I willbe processing some of this information for the first time. Even now, as I beginto write a lump grows in my throat, the air in the room seems to be gettingthicker and the feeling of nausea is overwhelming.

I write this for two reasons, one, for all of youwho have faithfully walked this journey with us. You have prayed with and forus, cried with us, fed us, laughed with us and carried us when we could nolonger walk on our own. We could not have walked this road without you. Two,because I never, ever want to forget God’s unending Mercy and Grace he hasshowered over us.

INTHE VALLEY… part 1

September 28, 2011

When Josh received chemo last time, it was histhird of five rounds and he was treated at MD Anderson in Houston. It was apretty normal treatment. He did sleep more than he usually does but we knew thethird round was a stronger dose so we were not really surprised when he sleptso much.

October 1, 2011

He slept most of the way home, and then more whenwe were home. The only concern we had with him sleeping so much was that he wasnot getting much fluid. Even the few moments he was awake he was not reallyhungry or thirsty. We encouraged him to eat but more importantly to drink asmuch fluid as possible. Nothing really sounded good to him but he would drink afew swallows.

October 6, 2011

He had his blood drawn in the hospital onThursday and all seemed good. By Sunday he seemed to be running a low-gradefever but nothing that alarmed us. He seemed a little more pale than usual aswell.

October 10, 2011

Monday morning we had Home-health come out andtake blood for his labs. Just a little over an hour later, Brian called to saythat we needed to get Josh over to the hospital right away for a transfusion.His blood counts had plummeted over the weekend. Brian came home right away andwe attempted to get Josh into the car. He had become so week that he couldbarely walk. Brian had to carry him out to the car.

We got right into a room at Coon MemorialHospital. The lab technician is a good friend of ours, and said he ran theresults right over to our doctor as soon he saw how low the numbers were. Icould see look of concern in his eyes as well as in the faces of the nurses.

I naively thought that they could just transfusehim and all would be good. Oh, if could have just been that easy. His fever hadalso gone up. Not too dramatically but enough that they were pretty sure hewould need to be officially admitted.

Latter that day, he was officially admitted andgiven a steady flow of blood, platelets and other fluids. His fever continuedto climb. More fluids were given. His critical condition warranted one-to-onenursing care. We had amazing nurses camped out in his room throughout the day.His awesome doctor also came by throughout the day to monitor his condition. A steadystream of dear friends from our church family and community came by to praywith us, wish him well, and bring us wonderful things to eat and drink.

Even with all of the great care, Josh still wasnot getting better. His fever began to spike to new dangerous levels. Hisbreathing became shallow. He was given antibiotics to fight the cause of thefever, still he grew worse. His breathing became fast and even shallower and hebegan to hallucinate. He heard voices of people that were not in the room. Healso began to have terrifying dreams.

As I look back, my memories are only dream-like. Somethings seemed to have happened in slow motion while other things seemed to takeplace in a flurry of activity. Some events and conversations I do not recall atall. My precious, comical daughter seems to think my impaired memory is becauseof my age. I believe it is because Our Papa Father knows just how much ourminds and hearts can take and mercifully blocks out the rest.

I can remember crying often. I tried keeping myfears from Josh. Many times I would escape to the bathroom down hall when Isimply could no longer hide my fear and pain. After releasing a torrent ofemotions and tears, I would attempt to re-compose before returning to hisbedside. Often silent tears would streak down my face as I sat beside him whilehe fitfully slept. No matter how much I willed them to stop, they would notcomply.

October 11, 2011

On Wednesday morning, Brian had gone to theoffice, in an attempt to get through some of his backlogged work. Josh seemedstable that morning but then, as the morning went on, he seemed to grow worse.They had hooked him up to oxygen but he just could not seem to breath normally.He was also having some pain in his left side.

Shortly before noon, I stepped out of the roomwith a visitor. Just as I was closing the door behind me, I heard him make aweird sound and start violently coughing. I ran back in. His heart rate spikedto well over 200. (His normal heart rate is around 50-70). He said thatsomething funny happened with his heart that made him start coughing.

We had a rush of activity in his room. His nurseattempted to get his heart rate down. His doctor was called in. I franticallytried to get a hold of Brian. I had poor phone reception while in Josh’shospital room and could not get a call out. I texted Brian to please come immediately.I attempted several times to get my text to send. It must have gone outeventually because Brian and Pastor Rodney arrived right after Dr.Turner.

Dr Turner is known for his ability to de-escalatea crisis situation. This time was no exception. He came in, amidst the chaosand seemed to calm things down. My fears lessened as I watched him calmlyassess the situation. He had a pretty logical explanation for Josh’s heart rateelevation. The panic that could be felt in the room earlier seemed to dissipate.

Shortly after that, Dr Turner explained that Joshneeded to be transferred to the PICU at BSA in Amarillo. A little alarm went off in the back ofmy head but I ignored it, wanting to blissfully believe all was still OK.

To be continued….

Marathon

2011-10-02T12:45:00.000-05:00

On July 20, we were given Josh's official diagnoses of AML. We had already suspected the diagnosis was not good. Dr. Sharp confirmed our worst fears. He did, however, assure us that Josh's prognosis was good as long as we sought treatment right away. One of the things he repeated, several times, was that his treatment would not be quick and easy. He said treating this disease is a "marathon, not a sprint". Our minds spun. We could never have gotten a grasp, back then, of what that meant. The funny thing is, that was just two and a half months ago, though it seems like a life-time.

So many things have changed; what we never even considered three months ago, has become routine to us. We pack up our family and basically live somewhere else for several weeks out of each month. We have learned all new routines and a whole new set of people. We have negotiated with doctors, cried with other parents, depended on dear family and friends and clung to our God with a fervor we never thought possible.

Sometimes we see a weariness in Josh's eyes that scares us. While this is hard on all of us, it is, of course, hardest on him. We worry about how much more of this his body can take. He has many bad days, but then, he has great days that make the bad days a little less painful. We have seen him grow tremendously through this journey. He has matured before our eyes. He is seeing the Lord in a new and powerful way. He is looking at life... and death, in a whole new way.

We cling to the words sweet Miss Betty McCallister says often, "We know not what the future holds, but we know Who holds the future!" As we run this marathon, we know we still have a long way to go. We struggle some days to keep our eyes on the Author and Finisher; other days we can almost feel His physical presence. We know He is refining us all. We know, now more than ever, of His goodness and power.

Lord, please help us to finish this marathon well by keeping our eyes on you. Help us to get back up when we stumble. Thank you for those who run along side us, they make our load lighter. We could not survive without them. Thank you for giving us a hope for the future.

After a grueling drive to Houston, the Lord provided us with great tickets an Astro's game. Some amazing people donated them to the Ronald Mc Donald House.

Sarah, enjoying the view from our awesome seating area at the Astro game.

Josh is VERY entertaining to the surgical staff just before he gets another bone marrow biopsy. The man with the bow tie is Dr. Reiting who will do the procedure.

This is Ian, he is a resident artist at MDA. He works with the kids on different art projects. He and Josh are standing in front of his latest creation. He had kids from the Pediatrics floor make leaves and other decorations and then he put it all together. He is a great guy. He is helping Josh hone his drawing skills.

Notice the nice shoes Josh and I are wearing. We clearly have given up style for comfort:)

Losing A Sweet Friend

2011-09-24T08:37:00.000-05:00

Since our new journey has begun, we have made some sweet new friends. We are not alone as we walk this cancer road. Many other parents have walked this road much longer than we have. Parents with little ones in varied stages in this fight against cancer.

In one of my earlier post, Universal Language, I wrote about a family we met at the Ronald Mc Donald house. Their son David was battling cancer. When we first met them, they were trying to make arrangements to fulfill Little David's dream of taking a Disney Cruise. They had only a small window of time to take the cruise because of David's condition. The amazing people of the the Make A Wish Foundation, and Disney Special Events were able to make his wish come true. They pulled off a small miracle for David and his family.

Make-A-Wish Foundation : National Home Page

Little David just recently went home to be with the Lord. His memorial service is today. Please pray for his sweet family who fought valiantly along side David in his battle against cancer.

My heart breaks for his whole family. For his gentle momma, who struggled to be strong while with him, to smile for him even though her heart was breaking more and more as the days slipped by. His brave dad who seemed at a loss because no matter what they tried, no one seemed to be able to heal their son. His little sister who, at a very young age, seemed to know there was something terrible about to happen, but just not sure what it was. For his aunts and uncles who would have done anything for him.

Throughout their struggle, they remained kind to all those around them. They gave gentle responses to those who asked for updates. They showed compassion to us all, knowing we were struggling with our own battles. Their love for our Lord never seemed to waiver. They blessed our lives immensely. We are so grateful to have had them in our lives even if it was for a small window of time. We will miss them all at the Ronald Mc Donald house and MD Anderson.

Lord, thank you for the opportunity to know this dear family. Please, please cover them with your grace and mercy. Please give his mom and dad rest and mend their broken hearts. Please let his little sister remember sweet memories of her brave big brother for the rest of her life.

Goodbye David, we will never forget your brave smile and sweet spirit.

Tears Again....Really!?!

2011-09-12T10:43:00.001-05:00

Growing up, I fancied myself a pretty tough cookie. I was not much of a crier. I had friends that would cry over a movie or a commercial or a song. Not me. Oh, I had my moments, but for the most part, I tried to hold back tears, even if it meant getting a head ache from the strain of not showing my emotions. I as I have gotten older, I have certainly become much more sappy...er I mean sentimental. As I left my teen years behind and life became more complicated, I became more prone to tears. Still I felt I maintained some symbalance of control over my tears.

That control is now completely gone. Our life has taken such a dramatic turn, it feels like any control over anything is now gone. My tears are no exception.

We are back home again. It is so wonderful to be back. I took one of our dogs for a walk this morning. Brian and I have walked our same neighborhood for almost four years now. This morning for the first time I noticed how beautiful the trees are that line our streets. I smiled as I fell back into the delicious routine of returning friendly waves of the people who drove by me on the street. This is a luxury many people in lager cities do not enjoy. These simple pleasures in life brought...you guessed, it tears. Not tears of saddness or loss but of awarness I guess.

I am working on not being embarraessed by my tears that come unexpectantly. I read somewhere that our Lord collects our tears. That thought alone brings a smile. Good thing heaven is a big place because somewhere there must be a whole store room with my name on it.

I know that we are not the only parents who have shed many tears for our children. We have dear friends that lost their teen daughter in a quad accident. We have other friends who lost her new born daughter. We have others friends that have walked their little ones through devastating illnesses.

A re-occurring thought, that runs through my mind, is that walking this journey day by day, not knowing from one day to the next what that day will hold, is hard enough. I am not sure we could have survived this far if we had actually known, in advance what each day held.

Ok, here's a really big thing for me to swallow. Our heavenly Father knows, in advance, what each day holds for all of His children. How many tears must he have shed for us? How many does he continue to shed for us? I don't believe He loves us any less than we love our children, in fact, I believe, with my whole heart, He loves us more. Trying to comprehend all of that is almost too much for me.

Dear Papa Father, thank you for loving us daily. May our tears for our children, remind us of your tears for us. Thank you for an everlasting love.

Support System

2011-09-08T06:14:00.000-05:00

On July 20th, as we sat in BSA, listening to Dr. Sharp confirm our worst fears, our son had Leukemia, my head swam. It was as if the world around me had suddenly become fuzzy. As I tried to focus and assimilate all that the doctor was saying, it felt as though I had lost all ability to comprehend the spoken word. I could see his mouth moving and hear sounds but I could not seem to process most of the words he was saying. A few of his sentences did get through the fuzz in my brain. One of those was that our son, Joshua, had Leukemia. Another statement he made stood out with some clarity. It was something to the effect of, "You will need to depend on your support system to survive this". I can vaguely remember thinking, "Well, we have a good support system".

Dr Sharp's statement has rung through my head time and time again. In hindsight, it seemed to be a bit of an understatement. The truth of the matter is, I am unsure of how we could have survived without our support system.

From the very first day that we took Josh to see Dr. Turner to ascertain the source of his fatigue, until today, we have been show almost incomprehensible kindness from our dear friends and family. We have had amazing support on every front.

We have had many visit from family and friends. We know our home and animals are being watched over and cared for by wonderful dedicated friends and neighbors.

We have had amazing meals provided both here in Houston and at home. The cards, letters, packages, pictures, texts, emails, comments and calls all have been a source of constant encouragement.

We have had financial support that has helped ease the pressure of the staggering cost of living away from home.

Most of all, we have had an army of prayer warriors marching beside us in this battle against a terrifying illness.

On some of Josh's worst days, I was unable to get a text out, yet we knew we were being covered in prayer. On other days, when things were going badly, I would, somehow be able to get a few bites of information communicated. On some of those days, we could, almost physically feel our prayer warriors go to their knees. Sometimes within 20 to 30 minutes of our texts going out, we could see a dramatic change in Josh's situation. Sometimes, a horrible day would take a turn so quickly it would be hard to comprehend and almost unbelievable had we not experienced it ourselves.

I know the Lord, our amazing Papa Father, is teaching us many, many things through this situation we find ourselves in at this junction in our lives. Among those lessons, is truly how vital our support system is.

Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for blessing us with the family and friends you have given us. We know that we still have a long road ahead of us in this journey. Thank you for providing us with amazing warriors to walk along side of us. We are blessed more than we deserve.

Smiling Again

2011-08-17T11:00:00.000-05:00

We have had some pretty rough days in the last week. It just seemed like one dilemma after another. Then, two days ago, it just seemed like we turned a corner. They identified what they thought is the cause of the fever and started treating it. His fever began to drop and his spirits began to lift.

Josh needs to walk to clear his lungs of things that might be causing the infection. Last night he was pretty week but agreed to walk. We went up to the observation deck of the building. The sun was setting and there was a patient playing the piano that is up on that floor. His mom was singing while his dad photographed the two of them. She sang beautifully and the sweet melody wafted through the air. It was surreal. It was almost as if we were simply out for a stroll. The only blatant reminder that there was something amiss was his mask and the IV poll, that has become Josh's constant companion.

We are still unsure as to what reason our Lord has for us not being able to return home yet, but we know He has one.

Dear Lord, help us to walk in a daily dependence on you. Thank you for some good days. Thank you for our dear friends and family that continue to walk this journey with us.

The Battle

2011-08-13T07:55:00.005-05:00

We have had some very hard days. We had hoped to be home by now. Clearly the Lord has a reason for us to still be here. We are just unsure what that is. We are grateful that we were still here when Josh's fever spiked. It would have been scary to try and fight it while we were on the road.

We know the fever is actually not to be feared. It is the outward sign of an inward battle. It is his body's way of fighting something that should not be there. There is a struggle within his body between good and bad cells.

Pastor Rodney told a story one day about a boy talking with his grandfather. The boy talked about how hard it was to make good choices. The grandfather told the boy that it is as if there is a fight between two large dogs within each of us. A good dog and a bad dog. The little boy asked his grandfather which dog would win the fight. The grandfather said, "The one you feed the most".

Cancer has become a symbol of so many things to us. The Doctors used chemo to wipe out the bad cells, sadly they had to kill good cells as well. We must try and get enough nutrients in Josh to feed the good cells but the bad cells are aggressive.

Dear Lord, help us not to fear the fever but to pray for the battle that rages within Josh's body. Help us also to recognize outward signs of the battle that rages within us all. Please help us not fight the process, knowing that you are a loving Father and will allow what is necessary to eliminate any cancer that might lie within us, so that we might carry out your plan for us.

Seeing Christ in the Hard Stuff

2011-08-11T06:33:00.004-05:00

Just when we think we have made it through the worst of this cancer thing, something new comes along. Yesterday, Joshua lost the bulk of his hair. At first, it was just a few irritating strands. They bugged him when they fell in his face. Then it began to come out in clumps when he ran his fingers through his hair.

Hair, in the scheme of things, might seem insignificant. But yesterday, his hair loss, seemed like another crushing blow. As parents, it was devastating to see. We felt helpless as a part of him slipped away. Again, the feelings of overwhelming grief and anger swept over us all. Another loss.

The only thing we could cling to was that our Lord knows the number of hairs on our head, and they could not fall with out His permission. Josh got to keep his hair a week longer than he should have. The doctors and nurses expected it to fall out much sooner than it did. As hard as it was to watch it fall out yesterday, it would have been much, much harder the week before.

We have heard that his hair will probably come back looking different than before he lost it. Oddly enough, last night as I was sitting on his bed, grieving the loss of his hair with him, the Lord reminded me of the Israelites. (I know weird right) As they were headed to the promise land, and they safely crossed a river or some other obstacle, they would build a pile of rocks. The rocks would be a reminder of what the Lord helped them overcome.

Lord, as Josh's hair grows back, please let it be a reminder of what You allowed him to overcome.

Waiting......

2011-08-10T05:59:00.004-05:00

We know the Lord has perfect timing...and that He knows exactly when Josh's body is going to start producing the good cells they need to be producing...we know all of that. It is just that the waiting is a little frustrating.

Last night they needed to move Josh to a different room. He was on the pediatric floor and they needed his room for younger children coming in. We totally understood that, it was just hard to pack up his room and not be headed home.

His nurses, on the 10th floor, all loved him and he loved them. They showed him great kindness and compassion. Many of them spent much time in his room just joking and laughing with him.

One sweet nurse, who was from India, came in and shared with Josh that she knew God had a great plan for him. She told him that man's medicine was good but it would be Jesus Christ that healed him. She was not even supposed to be working on our side of the hospital that day but felt led to take time out of her day...away from her other patients, to tell him that.

Another sweet nurse came in to take a picture with Josh and tell him that he was her favorite patient. She kept hugging him and telling him that she was so happy to have him as a patient.

We are sad to move to a new floor and leave them behind. One thing we do know is that there is something about Josh that draws people to him. He will make new friends on the 12th floor as well.

Lord, we know You have us still here for a reason. Please help us to learn what You want us to learn and do what You want us to do. Thank You Dear Father for covering us. Thank you for the body of Christ that lifts us up daily. Thank You that You are in control of ALL things including the room Josh is in. Please help us to reflect You on the 12th floor of MD Anderson.

P.S. There is an upside to waiting..we did get the, "Get Well", banner, that our Pal Kristy started, done...finally.

Missing Sarah

2011-08-07T09:57:00.011-05:00

We have heard that cancer does not just effect one family member but the whole family unit is effected. We have found that to be very true. Not only has our immediate family been empacted by Josh's illness, but so has our extended family, our friends and our community. We are grateful to have many, many people walk this journey with us. Many people have altered their lives to support and pray for us.

Our Sweet Sarah is no exception. She has given up many things as she has walked this journey with us. She has never complained.

One of the things we had planned for this summer, was a trip to the East Coast to spend time with "The East Coast Walton Family". We do not see them nearly as often as we like, but we have a fantastic time when we do manage to get together. This was the summer we had planned to do just that.

Well, as those plans changed, we cancelled travel plans for all of us but Sarah. She had been looking forward to this trip with great anticipation. Thanks to Brian's family she was still able to go.

Sarah and her cousin Kimmy

We miss her terribly, but know that she is being well loved and taken care of by our family. We are sad that she is not with us, but so excited that she is having a wonderful time. Thank you East Coast Walton Family for making this trip possible for her.

The East Coast Waltons....and Sarah

Universal Language

2011-08-05T11:26:00.004-05:00

Here at MD Anderson and the Ronald Mc Donald House, we have found of melting pot of many different nationalities and languages. We hear, all around us, giggles and laughter of little ones who speak words we do not understand. We simply know there is joy attached to the words.

There is also something else we hear from the parents of these little ones. It is grief. It sounds the same, no matter where you are from. Yesterday, I stood in the laundry room with a young mom, who in her beautiful broken English, told me about her eight year old son. His cancer had returned once again to ravage his little body. She searched for the right words in English to tell me that she could not find the words to tell her little boy the doctors had given up on him. There was nothing else they could do for him. The doctors told her and her husband, to take the limited time he had left, and try and find something fun to do with him and their daughter.

As I struggled to understand the individual words she was saying, I already knew what she was telling me. She turned and tried to hide her tears, only to find that mine had already begun. She did not need the correct words to say, I could see what she was saying in her eyes. I have seen that look countless times since I have been here. Its a look of recounting words about someone you love dearly, and hardly believing they are true, even after saying them so many times.

I had no wise words for this young mom, only tears. She let me hug her and we cried together.

Grief has a universal language...but so does caring and understanding.

My Devotional for today was on 2 Cor. 1:3-4 "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ... who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God".

Dear Heavenly Father, I do not presume to know Your plan, but I know You have one. I plead with You Lord, for this little boy and his family, they need a miracle.

Lord we have been comforted by You and by those who love us. Please help us to comfort those who are in need around us.

Thankful

2011-08-05T05:40:00.005-05:00

Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good, His mercies endure forever......

Thank you Lord....

That Josh still greats me everyday with his same boyish grin and that his treatments have gone so well.

That Sarah made it safely to Philadelphia and is being loved on by our East Coast Family

That Brian has been an amazing husband and father and has safely guided our family through this new terror in our lives.

That our older boys and their families have daily lifted us in prayer and have encouraged us all along the way. Thank you that they and their families remain healthy.

For dear family and friends that have walked this path with us and remind us daily of their support.

For local families that have become sweet friends and also continue to support us almost daily with delicious meals.

For today...because tomorrow holds no guarantee.

That I have managed to make it several days without further damaging my car in the parking garage...

Last but not least, thank you, Gracious Father for loving us with an everlasting love. Thank you that your mercies are new every morning!

And My God Shall Supply All Our Needs according to His Riches and Glory

2011-08-03T09:00:00.006-05:00

Josh and his Picc line

I am sitting downstairs of the RM House...waiting to drive Brian to the hospital. Today he will take a class to learn how to change the dressing on Josh's Picc line. We have to be cleared to do that in order to get Josh home.

Getting his Picc line dressing changed

I as I wait, I went through my new, usual routine, I make my vitamin juice (gross) and toast to help the juice go down. I am not in my own kitchen so I am now relying on the generosity of others, even as I a make something as simple as toast. As I go to butter my toast, and go looking for a knife.... I am pleased to find that someone.. the night before.. had replenished the empty knife drawer. Now, I am not sure who the knife fairy is..but I am grateful. This may seem like a small thing, but today, it is comforting to me.

I know there are many, much larger, more important challenges, ahead, like keeping Josh's Picc line incision clean, but for today.... I am grateful for a knife.

Dear Father, thank you for supplying our daily needs. Thank You for knowing what our future holds.

Perspective and Other Rambling Thoughts

2011-08-02T05:30:00.006-05:00

This is the third Tuesday we have spent in a hospital. The third week away from home. In some ways, it seems like time has sped by quickly, in a flurry marked off by a stream of conversations with Doctors, and nurses and changes in chemo bags. In another way it seems like we have been here for a lifetime.

By day, we become a part of a sub-culture that we call MDA-10th floor. We have learned the doctors routines, the nurses shifts and where the ice machine is. The smells, sights and sounds have become very familiar to us.

By night, Sarah and I come back to our temporary home, the Ronald Mc Donald house. Here we have become a part of another sub-culture that consists of the families will little ones with an illness. At first, I fought the acclamation process here. Seeing these families made Josh's illness too real. I was not ready to become a part of a culture that included conversations between moms and dads who were trying to plan out schedules between Dr.'s appointments... Who would stay home with the other kids and who would travel back to Houston for little one's next Dr.'s visit....it was all too overwhelming to me.

When we first arrived here, I was so devistated by what Josh was facing, I did not even want to see what others around me might be walking through as well. As time went by, and I began to breathe a little bit, the faces around me began to come into focus. I began to meet moms who had already traveled the journey we have just begun. They have shown Sarah and I great kindness. In them we see hope. In them, we gain perspective.

There are little ones here who wear their lack of hair proudly. They run and play with the other little ones. A sweet mom told me that her daughter, Sirah, who is 8 had already had a tumor removed from her brain several years ago. She had to re-learn everything. Now, once again, they feared she had another tumor. She told me that Sirah was undaunted by the thought of another surgery and re-learning everything...again. They had brought her back to MD Anderson to see if the tumor was rapidly growing, if it was, another surgery would be necessary. If not they would be able to go home and wait out the tumor. They got to go home yesterday.

Dear Lord, until this time, we have never know the terror of a sever illnes striking one of our children. There are many, many families who struggle through hospital stays, waiting games and crying out to You in the darkness of the night. Lord, forgive me for not looking and not seeing. Please Lord, heal these little ones, allow them to be a testimony to Your magesty. Help me to have eyes to see beyond the smiles of families that are walking this path. Help us to extend the love that has been extended to us.

The Waltz

2011-07-30T09:18:00.008-05:00

Hello, my name is Ilene. I am a Pattern Person. I am addicted to routine.

Now I have always known I was a Pattern person. I tell my children, on a regular basis....routinely..that the sooner they figure out the pattern of whatever they are dealing with..the better they can manage the situation.

I did not realize, however, that my routines had become so important to me. Back home, Brian and I had out routine. We got up between 5:30 and 6:00, went to our favorite chairs, read our Bibles, had our quiet time, and walked our dogs. As we walk, friends and neighbors drive by and wave.That was only one of many of our routines, I had become quiet set in them, too set apparently.

When I was growing up, my dad whom I adored, tried, mostly in vain, to teach his three daughters to waltz. He would often dance us across our kitchen floor. When we were really little we got to stand on his feet, as we got older we had to stand on our own. For the most part it was great fun.

On occasion, we would attend a business dinner or function with he and my mom and there would be dancing. Any time we felt brave enough, my dad would waltz us out on the floor. After the first few, very awkward steps, we would get into the routine and begin to feel comfortable.

Sometimes we would get too comfortable and begin to take lead instead of follow. When that occurred, my dad would simply smile and then spin us. As soon as we went into that spin, we no longer felt we had control, would become disoriented and had no choice but to follow my dad's lead once more. The funny thing is we never realized when we had attempted to take over the lead, nor did we ever expect the spin when it took place. My dad did.

When I was younger, my natural reaction was to fight the spin. I would stiffen up and try to resist the direction I was being headed, which would usually result in a disaster. I would often step on my dress as well as my dads toes and feel even more disoriented.

As I got older, I realized that I could trust my dad. That if I just allowed him to guide me through the spin, I still would feel totally out of control but that I would come out of the other side of the spin, usually headed in a new direction, but still standing, maybe even with a little dignity in tact. I began to understand more about the spin and not to fear it. If I trusted my father and followed his lead, while it still might feel awkward to me, to those watching, it actually might be quiet beautiful, and I would come out of it, trusting my father even more than when the spin began.

Dear Heavenly Father, to me, this is a spin that is only equaled by when I lost my Dad. I do trust You, I do. Please help me to lean into the spin and not resist. Please allow this to become a part of the waltz that we can look back on see beauty from the ashes. I do trust you Lord, I do.

Thanks Daddy for teaching me many things, even when I was stepping on your toes.

A MOM'S HEART

2011-07-29T10:38:00.006-05:00

My Sweet Sister-in-law Laurie responded on Joshua's blog by asking me how my heart is. Many others have asked the same question. I have sat down many times to put my thoughts into words. I have been so impressed about how Brian, Josh and Sarah have been able to express themselves through their blogs.

Each time I sit down to write, a strange phenomenon occurs...all the air gets sucked out of the room and I am unable to think or breath. This phenomenon first occurred as we sat in the emergency room and heard the words "Joshua" and "cancer" in the same sentence.

We are in day 3 of chemotherapy for Joshua. This is day 11 since we first sat in Dr. Turners office for Josh's first appointment to see why he was, "Not feeling well and was pale". I feel like our world has turned upside down since that day. I am happy to say that much of the initial terror has begun to subside. Tears still come often and without warning. Some days I can not complete a sentence to save my life. Yet through it all, I am so, so aware of the presence of our Heavenly Father.

On the days when the air in my lungs seems in short supply, the days when seemingly impossible decisions need to be made, or I begin to look at what the future holds for our son, I can do nothing but cry out to Our Father. I believe that He refills my lungs with His breath, filled with peace and calmness and I can breath once more.

For me, the hardest time of the day would come around 4:30 AM. When I would jolt awake in the darkness and stillness of a night that has not quiet become morning. Terror would over come me like a dark wet, heavy blanket waiting to suffocate me. My thoughts would race to Joshua and all this would mean for him. I would fear many things, his chances for survival, the treatment options, the financial resources it would take to beat this new terror in his life, my mind would just race.

On the third or fourth morning of this journey, I was reading Psalm 91....again. I have read this chapter many times, through many situations, again, it took on a new meaning in my life. I have camped on verses 4-6.

He will cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you will find refuge;

His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart

You will not fear the terror of night,

nor the arrow that flies by day

nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness

nor the plague that destroys the midday.

I am pleased the mornings that I sleep through the "terror hour". Many of those mornings, I hear from sweet friends that have prayed through the night for me. They have given up their sleep to cover me that I might have some rest. I am also pleasantly surprised to see that things are a little less formidable when I have had some sleep.

Alrighty, this is just a bunch of rambling that probably makes no sense to anyone other than me and it doesn't even make that much sense to me. Someday, I hope to recover the brain cells that depleated as soon as the "cancer" word entered our lives. In the mean time, I am grateful to Brian, Josh and Sarah who seem to have the ability to still form logical sentences.

Bathroom Make-Over on a Shoe String Budget

2009-04-06T21:06:00.010-05:00

Here are the results of my husband's labor of love. I am so very pleased with it.

This is the small cabinet that was hard to access because the door was blocked. (See prior post for the "before" pics) We took the door off and made it into cubbies. There is a quite a bit of usable storage space. We must admit there is still one wall with the disguised tile on it. As you can see above we just painted it white. We are hoping that will last a while before we have to attack one more tile/cement wall.

Look, no more saggy wall paper. The good news is that there was not too much scary stuff lurking behind the wall paper.

Here is more new storage space. Brian put in a medicine cabinet with lots of shelf space in it. Yes, we know we mixed gold and silver finishes. That's how it goes on a shoe-string budget.

Here is one of the walls that Brian took the tile off of. What a difference a few days make. This is the final result. Note, yet another storage cabinet and hooks. Yahoo!! The lighter paint made the bathroom seem a lot bigger. It is a wonderful birthday present. I am so, so grateful!

He's Speaking My Love Language!

2009-04-06T08:53:00.007-05:00

We have have just celebrated our one year anniversary in our, "new to us", home. The best we can tell is that it was built some time in the early 1900s making it around 100 years old. It is full of character and charm. The sweet family, that owned it before us, lovingly upgraded and restored most of the house. We were able to just move right into it. It has been the perfect home for us.

Over the course of the last year, we have continued to make small up-grades to our beautiful home. We are "DIY" (Do It Yourself), kind of people. Mostly because that is the only way we can afford to make the changes to our home, but also because, for the most past, we enjoy doing the work.

This year, for my birthday, my husband decided to tackle our upstairs bathroom. Now don't get me wrong, the bathroom was not in bad shape. It just had a couple of, umm.... well lets just call them "quirks".

Along with all of the "character" we inherited with an older home, we also inherited the lovely pink and blue bathroom tile. (Someday, I would like to learn the history of the Dalhart, pink and blue bathroom tile.) Anyways, the last family did an amazing job of disguising the tile with marble looking contact paper. It was a wonderful idea that bought us an extra year of not having to redo the bathroom.

Very clever tile disguise.

The second quirk was the lack of storage availability. It had a beautiful mirror over the sink that sadly, did not provide any storage options. There was also a cabinet over the toilet that was hard to access due to the toilet obstructing the path of the cabinet door. So, our one and only towel cabinet was very overcrowded.

Small unusable cabinet blocked buy the toilet.

The last quirk was that the beautiful, painted wallpaper, was beginning to sag. We knew it needed to be removed but we were fearful as to what we would discover lurking under the paper. So, we put the whole bathroom make-over on hold as long as we could.

Wall paper and shower steam proved to be a bad combination.

My birthday seemed to be the time to tackle the project. Knowing that my love language is "Acts of Service", Brian knew that the best gift he could give me was a bathroom make-over. Once he tackled the project, he realized how great of an act of love it really was.

Nice huh!

The tile was put on directly to a cement wall! Still, he persevered. A lessor man would have run away in fear. He is quite a guy.

The clever man in action...

And his helper

Here is what that giant hole in the wall began to look like a little while after the project was under way.

You won't believe how it all turned out. Tune into my next blog to see the finished product! (I know, I know, who knows then that will be:)

NOT LEUKEMIA!!!

2009-03-13T11:15:00.003-05:00

We just heard from Peter. God is so, so good. He had great news. Rebecca's doctors have ruled out leukemia. Rebecca is a cancer survivor. Four years ago, she fought the battle against leukemia and won. With all of the symptoms she was experiencing, doctors feared that the leukemia might have returned. They have ruled that out!!!!

They believe she is severely anemic. This comes as no surprise considering the high level of stress and long hours of work she encountered while serving in Iraq. According to Peter, she is undergoing some blood transfusions and getting rest. We are waiting to hear from her later today, so we should know more as the day goes on.

Thank You Loving Papa Father!! Thank you that we all get to witness your mightyness and compassion. Thank You for sweet Rebecca and Your mercy towards her. Thank You that Peter gets to see Your love unfold before his eyes. Lord please don't let us ever take Your mightyness or mercy for granted!

More on Rebecca

2009-03-12T14:39:00.002-05:00

I am so sorry that I have not put out an update on Rebecca. I have been hoping we would have some answers to give out, but we still do not. I talked with Peter just a little bit ago. He said Rebecca was having a MRI done about the time we were talking. I had talked with her earlier in the week and they had been running tests on her. She is hoping to start getting results back this Friday or Monday.

Rebecca sounded much better than I have heard her sound in a while. I think she has been able to get some much needed rest and that in itself has been healing. Thank you to all of you who have been praying for her. I have passed on all your emails to her. Your support means so much to her and to us.

As she gets anwers, she will pass them on to us and we will pass them on to all of you. Again, thank you.

Quick Update

2009-03-08T16:04:00.002-05:00

Rebecca is safe and sound in the United States! We talked with her yesterday evening. She was still very sick. Doctors will begin the testing process on Monday to attempt to find the source of the problem. Please pray for wisdom and discernment on the part of the medical staff that will be treating her. She sounded very weak and discouraged last night. Please continue to pray for her both for her physical, as well as emotional, well being.

Lord, Rebecca is struggling right now. Please make Your presence so clear to her. Please give the medical staff wisdom and compassion. Thank You for bringing her home safely.

A Response from Rebecca

2009-03-04T21:26:00.002-06:00

The last email I received from Rebecca, she was still in Kuwait. She should be just waking up. They are about nine hours ahead of us. She should know by 10:00 am, her time, if she will be able to get a flight out our not. Please continue to pray that she will fly home soon. She posted a comment on my last post to all of you who have been praying for her. I have posted it below for those of you who have not read it. Thanks again for your prayers.

I just wanted to sincerely thank everybody from the bottom of my heart for all of your prayers for me. I don't think that any of you will ever realize how much it means to me. I am only sad that I can't finish out my service to all of you over in Iraq. Please do me a favor and more than me, just think of those I left behind over there. They still have time to serve, and are doing a lot of work in my place. It is to them I owe a debt. I thank all of you again for thinking of me. I am confident that God is going to take care of me and will work everything out the way it should be.

Update on Rebecca

2009-03-03T21:04:00.003-06:00

Thank you so much for all of your prayers. We talked with her tonight. She is still in Kuwait. She is hopeful that she will get a flight out in the next day or so. She is exhausted and sounds run down. The doctors are unsure as to why she has been so sick for so long. There are doctors here in Texas waiting for her. They are very concerned about her red and white blood cell counts. She will be seen and if necessary, treated as soon as possible once she arrives in the states. She has asked me to pass on her gratitude to all of you who have been praying for her.

One of the things I did not mention in the prior post was that Rebecca had her military ID, bank card and her cash stolen after she arrived in Kuwait. Peter said that she would not be able to fly back to the states with out her ID. He was unsure about how she could get new ID or how long it would take. He was very frustrated and discouraged. We started praying, knowing that only God could sort the whole thing out.

One of the first things Rebecca told me was that they had found her ID and bank card. They had been turned in to the security office. Her money was gone but she is so thankful to have her ID. God is so, so good!

Lord, thank You for Your goodness and mercy. Please bring Rebecca home safely and quickly.

Please Pray

2009-03-03T14:14:00.004-06:00

I just got a phone call from our son Peter. His precious girl friend Rebecca, is very, very sick. As most of you know, Rebecca has been serving in Iraq with Peter. Last month, she got her hand crushed while loading equipment. She was preparing to be sent back to the states when she got very sick. She has made it as far as Kuwait and is waiting for an available seat on a civilian plane. Please pray that she can return to the states very soon. She needs to be cared for in an American hospital.

Peter is very concerned and has asked me to ask everyone I know to pray for her. She is an amazing gal who we have all fallen in love with. Please pray for her quick return and recovery.

We Are On Our Way Home!

2009-01-09T06:09:00.002-06:00

Wowwee!! It seems like we have been gone for a lifetime!! We are in Gallup at a really cute little hotel. I woke up at 4:00 AM ready to get on the road. Unfortunately, the rest of the fam. is not quite as anxious. So, as they sleep, I am able to do a little "blogging catch-up".

We have had a fantastic time. We stayed with my sister Emmalena and her family. She is an amazing host. There were nine of us staying in her home for two weeks. The time seemed to fly by. She made us feel so comfortable. We enjoyed her family very much.

We had a "second Christmas" with all of my family. My mom had put on a delicious Christmas dinner for us. The guys all shot skeet and the gals caught up on all of the latest news family news. It was a great day.

We packed a lot of things into our two weeks. Our vacation took an unexpected twist when our renters moved out of our Apple Valley house. They left it a MESS! So we spent the second week cleaning it up so we could get new renters in it. God is so good. We were able to move them out, sell all of the "junk" they left behind and get it all cleaned up and put back together in just five days!( All with the help of my wonderful family) Not excactly how we had intended to spend our vacation, but glad to have been there to take care of it. We were not able to visit with all of the fun pals that we had intended to, yet we saw God's amazing faithfulness through it all.

We look forward to being home. I have not even looked at our pictures that we took of the trip. I am hoping that there are some fun ones to post. If my family would just wake up we could get on the road so I can do a "We're Home" post. I guess I can let them sleep for a little bit longer. Driving six hours of driving with grumpies would not be fun:)

Prayers for Robert, Peter and Rebecca

2008-12-17T06:58:00.003-06:00

Thank you to all of you who continue to pray for Robert and Peter. This is a hard time of year for them. They along, with the rest of the troops stationed in Iraq, struggle with being so far away from family. We feel their loss more acutely now as well.

We talked with Robert last night. He is so grateful for the packages he has received from many of you. He said that all of the guys gather around when the packages are opened. When one of the guys get a package, it is as if all of the guys get a package. It is like receiving a "piece of home in a box".

Here are some pictures we have received from them lately.

This is Robert with one of his pals and the Vice Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff.

Peter on duty.

Peter and his adorable girl friend Rebecca.

I apologize to those who have asked me for their addresses and I have not given them to you. So sorry for the delay. Here they are:

PFC WALTON, RUDY PETER
ALPHA CO. 212 CAV
4 BCT #1 CD
APO\ AE 09330

PFC Walton, Robert A
TS IRONSHIELD
MNCI
APO\AE 09342

SPC Rebecca Smith
B co. 27th BSB, 4th BDE, 1 CD
APO, AE 09331

Thank you again for all of your prayers and support. Please continue to pray for their protection as well as their walk with the Lord.

Lord, please continue put Christ-like people into their lives. Please bring them home quickly and safely.

Also Tagged

2008-12-16T08:38:00.002-06:00

Alrighty, lets see it I can do this "tagged" thing right.

RULES:

1. Post rules on your blog.- Check

2. Answer the six four items.-Check

3. 4 Things I did yesterday-Check

a. Went and prayed and put together cookie bags with some awesome gals of FBC

b. Delivered some of the cookie bags to some very dear people-love it!

c. Gave Sarah her final final. She passed with flying colors- Yay Sarah!

d. Got a call from a very fun friend from Arizona. We have been friends for 23 years. Had not talked with her for a while. We had a lot to catch up on.

Wow, it was a great day yesterday!! (Just don't ask me what I DID NOT get done:)

4. 4 Things on my wish list.-Check

a. That my children will always continue to seek after our Lord and Savior.
b. That our two sons will return safely from the war.
c. That a miracle would happen and someone different would get into office than who was voted in.
d. That I could build a totally energy efficient home that would not cost a fortune.

5. 4 Things I look forward to.-Check

a. Time with our Lord
b. Morning walks with my Handsome Husband
c. Goofing off with my kids
d. Visiting with dear friends

6. 4 restaurants I like- Check
a. In-n-Out
b. Del Taco
c. Mimi's
d. Gus Jr.s

7. 4 Favorite TV shows- Check

a. The "old" Cosby Shows
b. The Dog Whisperer
c. Bonanza
d. The Andy Griffith Show

8. 4 People I tag (Your it). Kelley Simpson, Katy Nelson, Mindy Holloway, Dana Abla

Hey look I did it. That was not so bad:) Have a great day!

Frist Christmas Season in our New Home

2008-12-06T17:37:00.007-06:00

This house has been so fun to decorate. We feel very blessed to live in a home with so much character.

So first...the process YII!!

The time of discovery is so much fun. Sarah enjoys recalling the history behind different ornaments and decorations. She loves the holidays and all that they stand for.

I am so thankful that the kids never seem to outgrow the Christmas spirit. We sure miss Robert and Peter around this time of year. Decorating the Christmas tree has always been a family event.

The final step

The finished product

(Pretend that you can hear the Christmas music and smell the evergreen and cinnamon aroma:)

Thank you Lord for a Special Season to celebrate You! May we carry it with us all year long.
Merry Christmas everyone.

Back in the Loop

2008-12-02T09:09:00.003-06:00

I know, I know, I have totally let the ball drop on this blogging thing. I can give a million excuses as to why but none of them would hold much water. The reality is I just have not had much to blog about. Things have been nice and quiet around here. (Thank you Lord!)

I love this time of year, so the good news is, I have been taking pictures again. We are in the midst of decorating. (A picture of what things look like now would not be good.) Soon we will be done and I will post the final results.

My computer has been having some issues. As weird as it sounds it seems to freeze up in this cold weather. I have learned that I have to allow it to "warm up" before I start trying to use it. (Yes Dana, it is from California) I guess, like the rest of us, it is still trying to acclimate:)

Now that I can use my computer again, I am just starting to catch up on all of the blogs I have missed. Boy, have I missed a lot! It is really fun seeing all your great holiday pics. I just love this time of year.

I pray that all of you will have an amazing December. I pray that God will bless you and your families abundantly. More than anything, I pray that the busyness of this season will not override the Reason for the season, our Lord and Savior. Lord thank you for giving up everything that we might have everything when we deserved nothing.

fbcdalhartwomen.blogspot.com

2008-10-31T11:16:00.002-05:00

Dana Abla has begun a blog for the women of FBC Dalhart. Please add it to your lists of blogs. Thank you Dana for being "willing" to take on this project. (Great idea K. :) Thank you Lord for the amazing women in the Body of Christ!

In Search of a Great Book.

2008-10-15T09:03:00.002-05:00

Our Sarah has caught the reading bug! We are so excited. Several times throughout the past few days, I have stopped suddenly and thought, "I have not seen Sarah lately." As I go looking for her, I find her snuggled somewhere with a big, soft, warm blanket reading a book. This is a new thing for her. In the past she has struggled with reading. I have prayed that she would "fall in love with reading".

Brian and I can look back to the point where we began devouring books. We were both about the age that Sarah is now. When I find Sarah reading, it warms my heart. It brings back memories of slower times in my life when a good book could carry me to far off places. There were times when I was younger that I would spend the whole day reading! O the good ole days:)

Anyways, Sarah is just finishing up HuckleBerry Finn. I am looking for suggestions for a book series for her. She is thirteen and loves adventure. As you could probably guess from the book she is reading now, she is not really into girly, girl books. She has read most of the American Girl books as well as Anne of Green Gables. We would love some suggestions. Please let us know if any come to mind.

Sweet Friends

2008-10-14T12:20:00.002-05:00

This morning I woke up the sound of the gentle rain. A wave of gratefulness engulfed me. I felt so aware of the bounty of God's goodness.

Over the last few weeks and days, we have been surrounded by dear friends who have exemplified Christ through their love and acts of kindness towards our family. This love and kindness has come in many different forms. Some premeditated, some random and spontaneous. All greatly appreciated

So, to all of you, I hope you know who you are, I would like to offer my truest, most sincere, heart felt, thanks. The funny thing is, you might even think that your actions might have been, "just some small thing". To us, it was HUGE.

As friends you have come along beside us and walked arm and arm beside us. You probably did not know it but without you, we probably could not have stood. You showed up at our front door on a very dark night just to pray with us and surround us with love. You pulled me to my knees to pray when I absolutely could no longer stand. Many of you have prayed scripture over us, you spoken to us out of the Spirit not out of your flesh. You have spoken the truth in love to us. You have allowed us to ask for prayer for us without requiring an explanation. You have been genuine. Thank you.

Thank you to the dear friends who dropped gifts off that we might find them on our front porch and in our mail box. Thank you for the kind notes, phone calls and emails of encouragement and support. Thank you for the sweet "vandalism" on the church windows that has brought many smiles and fun comments over the last few weeks or so. Thank you to the dear ones that prepared a meal for us that seemed to be prepared for royalty, yet it was just for us. It was a delicious meal served with such warmth. It filled our stomachs and our hearts.

Thank you to the gals who spent several hours on their knees with me, reading Scripture and claiming the Lord's promises, reminding me over and over of His faithfulness. One of those dear gals reminded me of the Biblical "sewing and reaping" principle. My prayer for all of you is that you will reap a bountiful harvest of blessing in return for the sweet seeds of kindness you have sewn into our lives. Through you we have been reminded, once again, of the magnitude of the love our Lord has for us. Thank you!

FIRE PROOF... A MUST SEE!

2008-10-05T17:37:00.002-05:00

I don't normally give movie reviews. I guess probably because there is not much out these days that is worth writing about. Fire Proof, is worth writing about. It is incredibly well done. The Kendrick brothers have outdone themselves this time. I am a huge fan of their first movies, Fly Wheel, and of course, Facing the Giants. As you might guess from these two, each new movie they make, gets better. I loved the story lines of the first two movies, but the acting left a little to be desired. This is NOT the case with Fire Proof.

I read a great review that summed things up pretty well. I posted it below.

http://www.revelife.com/

Fireproof Movie Review: Kirk Cameron's Saving Marriage, Saving Lives
by miss poppy

Sherwood Baptist Church's media team, creators of Facing the Giants, has just released another film, Fireproof.

The film stars Kirk Cameron as firefighter Caleb Holt, who has an exemplary service record, but a terrible record as a husband. The main part of the film focuses on his efforts to save his marriage and what he learns through a book he follows called "The Love Dare." He attempts to re-win his wife's heart through things like cooking dinner for her and dealing with a personal addiction. It also features realistic fire rescue sequences.

I enjoyed Facing the Giants, but Fireproof clearly has higher production values and a better script, along with better performances. It is a highly enjoyable movie.

The film has a good deal of realism. The tone is heavy in some spots, as Caleb and his wife contemplate divorce and fight intensely with each other, but there is also a liberal amount of comic relief involving several side characters.

One thing I want to emphasize is that this film is not for children. There is nothing that would be offensive to an adult, but it features verbally escalated and physically intimidating arguments. Caleb takes out his anger violently on inanimate objects, and there are also scenes of intense fire emergencies and the aftermath of a serious car crash.

The heart of Fireproof is a mixture of love, respect, and faithfulness. The point it very poignantly reiterates is that marriage is about much more than going with the feelings of the moment. Instead, it is a lifelong commitment that is worth fighting for at great cost.

There is a point in the movie in which Kirk Cameron's character kisses his on-screen wife. However, Kirk won't kiss anyone except his real-life wife Chelsea Noble. So, the producers dressed her like the actress and shot the scene in silhouette. I just saw the movie, and I promise, you can't tell. It's a very sweet, tender scene, and I think that knowing this adds another dimension to the affirmation of marriage.

Fireproof is worth seeing, not only to support a Christ-centered ministry, but because it is a good story. The emotions displayed in the film are raw and moving; people around me in the theater were sniffling throughout many scenes. Kirk Cameron's performance is strong and believable, and he lifts the movie to a new level of reality.

I felt that the gospel message, in particular, is presented very skillfully in this film. It is laid out quite specifically, but in a way that is appropriate to the scene in which it occurs, rather than being wrenchingly tacked on in a place it doesn't belong.

I encourage you to see this movie. It affirms marriage and selfless love in a God-honoring, entertaining, and believable way, and besides, it's an exciting and fun story about likable people. http://www.revelife.com/

There are many reasons why I loved this movie. Aside from all of the obvious reasons, I loved that you can see some of the same cast members from the prior movies, cast throughout this movie. Also if you look closely, you will notice that Caleb Holt, (Kirk Cameron), drives the same truck that was given to the coach in Facing the Giants, with the same plates on it that say, "Jay Austin Motors," which is the car dealership from Fly Wheel. I know, I know, these are small details, but I love them.

I love that these movies started as a church backed project that was never intended for theaters. Three movies later, they are still at it. My entrepreneurial spirit cheers for them. They are facing the giants of Hollywood and standing their ground. My prayer is that Christians everywhere will cast their vote in favor of this movie by buying up tickets. If they have seen the movie already, I pray that they would buy more tickets and give them to their unsaved friends.

BLXLLNR, Dyslexia at its best

2008-10-01T09:10:00.003-05:00

Alrighty!! I must confess that, when leaving a comment on many of your posts, I have to put the code in more than one time. Am I alone in this or are the fellow dyslexics that struggle with the same issues? I know, I know, it might just be me:)
P.S. I have no idea why there is a line under my comment. Nor do I know how to get rid of it. Clearly, I have issues:)

Robert, Our First Born.

2008-09-30T07:39:00.006-05:00

Alrighty, I already see the irony in the fact that I am writing about our first born son, last. I guess if asked about the order I would probably say that it was just a timing thing. I started blogging just about the time that Peter was coming home, so I wrote about him first and the rest of the blogs just kinda fell into place. In reality though, if I were to be perfectly honest, I would have to say that, Robert is probably our most complex child. Which makes him a little harder to write about.

We are so proud of him and we want everyone to know all about him. There are just many different facets to him. As you see from his pictures, he is incredibly handsome. (How's that for a boastful mom:) (I feel like I am safe in boasting about that because our genes had nothing to do with his good looks. So does that make it OK?:) His heart is so good, but we see a struggling in his identity.

When he first came to live with us, he was three and turned four within two months of being in our home. He was a very angry little boy. He had a very limited vocabulary for his age. The one word he did have down was, "NO". The first few days of him being in our home were marked with his fits of anger in which he would repeatedly scream, "No, no, no ,no!" As brand new foster parents, we had no idea what to do. We were given very little information about him, so we did not even know where his anger was coming from. Sometimes his outburst only lasted for a few minutes, sometimes they would go on for an hour our more. Sometimes he would let us hold him through it, sometimes he did not want to be touched.

As the months went by, we struggled to understand him. Brian and I had both come from very stable families so we did not even really understand that there were little ones being raised in homes that were filled with violence, rage and neglect. So, as we struggled to understand these two little boys who had suddenly come into our world, our eyes were opened to a whole different lifestyle that we did not even know existed.

When were preparing to have Robert and Peter come to live with us, we changed our floofy guest room into a little boy's room. Away went the sea foam green and peach colors and out came the primary colors of blues and reds. The newest 101 Dalmatians movie had just come out so we used that pattern throughout the room. We purchased Tonka trucks, baseballs, in-line skates and many other little boy things for them. We were so excited to have these two little ones become a part of our lives. One of the cutest things we purchased were two little red toddler beds. We wanted the beds to be just the right size for the little guys.

They did indeed seem to like their new room. We noticed something very peculiar early on about Robert. Each night we would tuck him into his bed, pray with him, smooch his little forehead and say goodnight. We would later check on him and his little bother and they would be fast asleep in their beds. Yet, the following morning, Robert would be sleeping on the floor, by the foot of his brothers bed. He could not explain why or even when he had gotten there.

Early on in their stay, their social worker encouraged us to get counseling for the boys. Throughout that year, we learned more and more about their circumstances prior to coming to live with us. We learned that, at the very young age, Robert had attempted to protect his bio mom and his brother from extreme violence that was going on in the home. We do not know, to this day, who was the instigator of the violence. We simply know that it existed and occurred on a routine basis. Robert's lying on floor, at the foot of his brothers bed, was a trait he had learned at a very young age. In his mind, it was his way of protecting his little brother. Robert was only three and he already felt like he was the only resource his brother had.

It took him several months of living in our home before he realized that he no longer had to be his brother's protector. We saw his countenance change, as if a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. We saw him start to become a little boy who could play without the burden of being a parent to his brother. We also saw much, not all, but much, of his anger begin to melt away.

Looking back on those years, we wish we had understood so many things much better than we did. His counselor told us that, because he saw so much violence during his, "pre-verbal years", he has a hard time articulating his anger. We wish we knew better, back then, how to help him through that. We see him still struggling with that now, and it breaks our hearts.

His heart is so good. We love him so much and we are so proud of him. Our prayer for him is that he would allow his Heavenly Father to unlock some of those hidden closets of his life and be set free. Free to be all that he was created to be.
Thanks again for your prayers.

Josh and the Joy He Brings Us

2008-09-22T10:53:00.001-05:00

In 1994, we were neck deep in foster-parenting two very rambunctious, handsome little boys, Robert and Peter. They had already been through a lot in their young lives before coming to live with us. They were, to put it gently, quite a handful. We felt that we were, at that time, a complete little family. After all, there were two of them, and two of us...perfect. The boys had been in our care for almost two years by then and we were just beginning to get the hang of the whole parenting thing.

One early Friday morning, we received a call from the agency that was overseeing our fostering endeavor. They had a little guy who needed a home, "just for the weekend". They had identified a family for this little guy, but they were out of town for the 4th of July holiday weekend.

With that, Joshua, a little roly-poly 5 month old baby boy, bounded into our lives. We had never done the "baby" thing. Robert and Peter had come to us as toddlers, not as babies. "Well", we thought, "it was just for the weekend". "We would survive, and so would he".

That was over thirteen years ago. So much for "just for the weekend". We are so thankful that the Lord chose for him to be a part of our lives. The Lord had a plan for Joshua and for us, way before Josh was ever born. The first five months of his little life were filled with extreme trauma. It breaks my heart thinking of all that he went through, yet God had a plan. We are so grateful that our Heavenly Father is in control of all things. What Satan meant for evil, God has made good.

Josh and his big brother Robert

He has added so much joy to our lives. He is bright, loving and intuitive. We believe that he will be true to his name and someday become a great leader and a "Mighty Warrior", like the Joshua of the Old Testament, for our Lord and Savior.

Joshua has asked me to let everyone know that he now has his own blog page. It can be viewed at believingfollowingleading.blogspot.com. (Yes, in case anyone is wondering, he was much faster at figuring it out than I was:)

Another New Chapter in Life

2008-09-18T09:40:00.004-05:00

Sarah, Rebecca and Josh

Its funny how when the kids were little, I always knew there would always be a "next phase", in life. The first smile, then cooing, first teeth, first steps, potty training, even first days of school, etc.. As a young mom, I never really thought much beyond those early "firsts".

I knew that somewhere, out there, were the "teenage" years. But they seemed forever away. Frankly, I had always prayed the, "rapture before puberty", prayer thinking that maybe we would skip those years. Clearly, that did not happen. Then, I tried forbidding them to turn 13. They ALL disobeyed me and turned 13 anyways. So, we ushered in the teenage years.

The first two were a little harder, simply because of our learning curve. Now we are into the teenage phase with the second two and it seems to be going a little easier. I think mostly because we know, a little better, what to expect.

Wouldn't you think that would be an end of the new phases? Noooooo! Then comes the, "growing up and moving away", phase. I would tell you about all of that, but that would take forever. I want to fast forward to the, "Mom, I met someone" phase.

One of the things I have not yet mentioned about Peter's homecoming was that exact statement. (Don't worry, he has given me permission to tell this story.) Shortly, after we met Peter at the airport and we had exchanged some small talk and made a rest stop, he said, "Mom, I met someone and I think you are really going to like her".

Now first, let me explain a little bit about Peter. Throughout junior high and high school, Peter had many friends, many of them girls. He even had several "crushes". Some of them serious enough to talk to us about, but never a serious girl friend. He laughed at his friends that had one girlfriend after another. He told of how several of his friends that had girl friends long enough to spend a bunch of money on them, only to have them dump or be dumped.

So, when he came home saying that, "he had met someone", we knew this could be serious. All the way home from Amarillo, he told us about Rebecca. Of course, as the mom, I had a million questions for him. (No surprise there) The first question was, of course, her walk with the Lord.

"She's a Christian, mom, she loves the Lord very much". He went on to tell us of her generosity, her kindness, of course of her beauty and of her compassion. She sounded wonderful, but you know, as a mom, the proof is in the pudding.

He talked with her everyday he was here, both on the phone and through IMs. Rebecca's leave was to overlap Peter's by about two days depending on flights. She flew into Killeen, so he knew he would be able to see her for a very short time before he flew to Iraq. He also knew that she would then leave Killeen and head to Colorado, which just happened to take her right through here.

He asked if we would like to meet her. That was a silly question, of course we did. Peter told his dad that he was a little afraid for her to meet us because, "Mom might ask her too many questions and scare her away". (Who me?:)

All of that long drawn out story to tell you that we did meet Rebecca. She was all that Peter had promised and more. (It is funny, you pray a lifetime for your children's future spouses, and then you meet someone who might possibly be one of them, and your shocked at how well God answered your prayer.)

We found Rebecca to be polite, sweet, intelligent and yes Peter, very beautiful. More than that, she loves the Lord and desires to walk closely with Him. Rebecca, is serving along side Peter in Iraq. What a great place for them to truly get to know each other. They have to see each other for who they really are, on a daily basis. There is not really an opportunity for "glamorous dating", they both work long hours under stressful conditions.

We are hoping to get a chance visit with Rebecca a little more as she travels back to Killeen. We are praying for our Lord's protection and guidance over both of their lives. Thank you to all of you who continually lift both of our sons up before the Lord as they go through the many phases in life.

Our Sweet Sarah

2008-09-12T07:34:00.005-05:00

We have always thought of Sarah as "the icing on our cake". After trying, to get pregnant for years, we had decided we were probably not going to have biological children. Which was heart breaking, but the Lord had put "fostering and adoption", on both of our hearts at a young age. We simply thought this was His way of leading us down that path sooner than later.

The day before the completion of our older two son's adoption, much to our delight, we discovered we were pregnant! I just had to giggle at the Lord's timing. We were also fostering another precious baby named Joshua, at the time. Somehow, we knew she was a girl right from the start. While we looked at many girl names, Sarah was the name that seemed right. We had waited a long time for her. At the age of 30 I felt "old" to be pregnant. (oh to be 30 again:) We felt the joy that Sarah and Abraham must have felt at the knowledge that they were finally pregnant. So, the name Sarah was a natural choice.

Sarah has brought much joy and laughter to our lives. She is an eternal optimist. She sees the good in everything and everyone. She is solution driven. In her mind there is not a dilemma that cannot be fixed or a problem that cannot be solved.

She has a very unique sense of humor, which leaves her often misunderstood by her peers. She seems to be OK with that. She marches to the beat of a different drummer. She reminds me of King David, dancing before the Lord.

She delights in each new season. She was ready to decorate for fall in August. If she had her way, she would already have the Christmas lights up. (I think she gets that trait from her Aunt:)

She has a strong mothering instinct. When any of her bothers were in trouble. She was, and still is, quick to rush to their defense. If one of our sons were on time out, she would stand by their side and pat their arm and say, "it's OK". She still does that now, to anyone in need. She is quick to stand by their side in hopes of making everything OK.

We are so thankful to our Heavenly Father that He blessed us with all of our children. We are thankful that He allowed us our one, "home grown", child. We are thankful for Sarah and all the joy that she brings.

A Man Where a Boy Once Stood

2008-09-02T19:05:00.005-05:00

As our time with Peter is nearing the end, we have finally grown accustomed to the "More Grown Up", version of our son. We saw pretty dramatic changes in him right from the start. Things like, he brought US presents, he spoke in sentences that entailed more than one syllable and he wanted to shop at Ross instead of major, name brand, department stores. (Who is this guy and what has he done with our son?:)

All kidding aside, Peter is truly growing up. He seems to have a new outlook on life. He is so grateful for our wonderful country. His patience level for his younger brother and sister has greatly increased. He has become much more frugal. He is quick to express his appreciation. He is just, well, more introspective, I guess is the best way to put it. He seems to be figuring out who he is and where he wants to head in life. While only barely turning nineteen, he seems to have left the "turbulent teen" years behind. He is quick to admit that, while he stills makes mistakes, he is working on walking with the Lord.

We have had many wonderful, "late night", conversations with him. We have laughed often. Our time with him has been sweet. Somewhere over the last year, our boy has become a man. We are so proud of him. We are sad that our time with him is quickly coming to an end.

Camel spiders and M.R.Es...Ugh!!

2008-08-30T06:54:00.006-05:00

While Peter has been home, he has shared with us many of his experiences of being in Iraq. It is a amazing to think that, while we enjoy all the comforts of everyday life, there are young men and women enduring great hardship for the freedoms many of us take for granted. He has told of us the scorching heat, (the hottest day for him was 147 degrees!!) the sand storms so thick that you can not see the sun and, of course, the famous Camel spiders.
YIKES!!!

While he is on his base he sleeps in a trailer with air conditioning and he gets to eat pretty decent food. When he goes out on a mission, he looses even those small luxuries.

On a mission, the living arrangements are, at best, primitive. There is no running water and the only water they have available to drink is rationed, bottled water, that is usually hot. For every meal they eat a M.R.E. (The Meal, Ready-to-Eat (MRE) is a self-contained, individual field ration in lightweight packaging procured by the United States military for its service-members for use in combat or other field conditions where organized food facilities are not available. From Wikipedia, )Yumm!!

So, all that to say, Peter is enjoying being home. On the way home from one of our trips to Amarillo, he said, somewhat wistfully, "Being home makes me not want to go back, everything in the States is so nice". He knows he needs to go back. He has a job to finish. He just has a whole new perspective on all that we have because we are Americans.
Last night at dinner he said, "I hope that people appreciate all that we (soldiers) are going through so that we (Americans) can enjoy what we enjoy". He was recalling how, when the war first began, people were so patriotic. Everyone had flags in their front yard and were proud to be Americans. He said that if feels like they have forgotten that soldiers are still fighting for them.
Our younger son, Josh, reminded him that we would always have a flag hanging for him and the rest of the soldiers.
I woke up thinking about that conversation. I guess my prayer for all Americans is that we will remember that freedom is not free. A great price has been and will continue to be paid for it. May we never take it for granted.

Peter enjoying some of the finer things in life, chocolate brownies and a cold glass of milk:)

Thanks!!

2008-08-26T22:12:00.004-05:00

Thank you, to all you who have posted comments to Peter. He has read each one. We all are touched by your kind words. I think that sometimes when the guys are in Iraq, they forget that they have tremendous support here at home.
I have added a few more pictures but I still don't have the whole "pic thing" figured out.

Peter is Home Safe and Sound!!

2008-08-26T08:40:00.006-05:00

The day we had been waiting for finally arrived, Peter came home! (I am not sure if it is possible but it seems like he has gotten a little taller). His flight finally arrived at 9:00 last night in Amarillo. He was exhausted but so glad to be on American soil.

While we were waiting for his bag, he told us a really fun story about arriving in Dallas. The plane he flew into Dallas on was filled with about 120 soldiers, all arriving from Kuwait. He said, when they landed, two fire trucks saluted the plane buy spraying water high into the air. Then when they entered the terminal, he could hear them announcing their arrival over the intercom. Peter said, "Mom, I felt like a celebrity!". There was over 500 people standing and cheering when they walked through. There were people of all ages greeting them and thanking them for serving our country. He told us of a sweet elderly gal waving pom poms and giving them all hugs as they came by.
We are so grateful to those people! Peter and his fellow soldiers had been trying to get home since Thursday. That alone made it all worth while.
As we stood and waited for his bag, others came up and shook his hand or patted him on his back and thanked him. His tired eyes lit up and he flashed his little boy grin. My heart swelled. I am so happy to have him home!

2008-08-25T12:57:00.000-05:00

Our Son is coming home today!

2008-08-25T09:00:00.003-05:00

It is a big day for us in the Walton household. Our second to the oldest son, Peter, is coming home today. He is on leave from Iraq. He called us at 5:30 am our time, on Friday, to say he was already in Kuwait and was waiting to get on a plane headed for Germany in a few hours. His plane was delayed until the next day. Then he emailed us from Germany to say that he had another delay. UGH! The poor guy. I am not sure where he stays during these delays. We have not heard from him since then but he is supposed to get into Amarillo sometime today. All we can do is wait.

We are so anxious to see him. Through our phone conversations and emails, he sounds so grown up. We are looking forward to hearing all about his experiences in Iraq. As a mom, I am just so glad to get him home safe, even if it is just for a short time.

He has been without many of the luxuries we take for granted, home cooked meals, candy bars, soft drinks and safe comfortable surroundings. We are looking forward to helping him enjoy some of those things. Thank you to all of you who constantly lift our sons and our family up in prayer.

Dork

2008-08-25T08:01:00.000-05:00

Ok, I am still trying to figure all of this silly stuff out. I feel like I am learning a foreign language. How do you girls do it? (Thanks for the encouragement Katy.) I have spent the last hour just trying to get simple things done. (Thank goodness for online tutorials:) I will keep working at it. Hopefully, I will get something of substance on here soon.

Making the leap from stalker to blogger..YII

2008-08-24T21:34:00.000-05:00

Ok, I have finally done it. I have transitioned from stalker to blogger. I am already becoming anxious about trying to keep up with this. I love reading everyone's blog. Now, fearfully, I am jumping in. I am so impressed with all of the young moms who seem to find time and wit to share some interesting thoughts. Wow, how will I ever keep up!?!